Making it Right Side Up

I realized recently it isn't often I slow down enough to make time to write.  I also realized, writing is something I really enjoy and what better subjects do I have to write about than my family.  It's been just under two years since a new life was introduced into mine.  While on first thought I'd say this life flipped mine upside down, I realize it actually made it right side up.  Let me tell you how.

Before I get too far into how this has happened, you need to know a little about me.  I've always been a hard working, dedicated, quiet, reserved,  anti-procrastination, and at times an anal neat freak who always has "it" together for "them"; whatever "it" is for whoever "they" are.  I've always been outward focused while internalizing everything. I'm the type of person who could spend 20 minutes deciding on the color of a new spiral bound notebook while painstakingly weighing the pros and cons of each.  Insert new life here and everything changes.

At first it was an adjustment having new items (swings, burp cloths, diapers) around, but we tried to nicely integrate them into our existing decor.  A few months later, introduce crawling, then walking, and now running; not so nicely integrated anymore.  Well, not nicely integrated unless you define that as pick up 10 items, drop them, kick them around a little, then you've decorated.  Yes, this new world of having an ever changing group of toys, clothing, and Sippy cups as part of the normal decor is quite a change for me, which brings me back to my original point.  This new world has turned my old view upside down, but in this case, it was for the better.  I've realized I was too uptight, too worried about organization, too worried about clean, too worried about "it" being together for "them", or at least appearing so.  I've realized the importance of relaxing, enjoying, and really just playing and it really is fun.

So as I speak, a small pig flying in a "super flyer" is rolling down my leg into a pile of plastic fruits and vegetables intermixed with wooden blocks displaying the alphabet in various colors.  When I look to the left, there are about 10 books piled on the floor in no particular order or orientation that came from a shelf with 10 more books arranged similarly.  Straight ahead is a cart which houses mega blocks and some wooden puzzle pieces representing occupations.  The TV is still where it always was, but sometimes I have to look past the fingerprints, snot smears, and slobber marks to see what's really on the screen.  The oven in little plastic kitchen next to me is working hard at cooking up a plastic orange, a Starbucks coffee cup, and a plate.  The attached microwave is apparently cooking a stuffed polar bear.  Continuing on there are constantly moving items like a step stool, a bouncy ball, a beaded necklace you might find at Marti Gras, Noah’s ark (the exploded version), some baby dolls, superheroes, and other plastic, sometimes noisy, devices.

So that just leaves me, the still hard working, dedicated, not as quiet, not as reserved,  anti-procrastination, and hardly ever anal neat freak who couldn't care less about ever having "it" together for "them"; and I love it!  

Thanks Elliana!

Busy, Busy...

During Elliana's nap time today, I was reading medical journals about toddlers (Do I know how to relax, or what?) and found this statement, "Occasionally, toddlers will spend a solid five minutes or more on one toy, but expect that to be the exception, not the rule." Well, that explains why I am so tired at the end of each day!

Everyday, I am learning a little more that life with a toddler is busy. Even "lazy" days at home are busy. Cleaning takes about three times longer than it used to as things are constantly being "rearranged and put away" according to Elliana's standards rather than my own. "Help" is Elliana's new favorite activity and a meltdown occurs when the chore is over as Elliana wants to keep helping. Although this stage can be trying at times, I am enjoying my daughter's excitement to help and be a big kid. I think sometimes I am just amazed at how BIG she is! Time is going too fast, and these little blogs help me to sit down and appreciate each moment as it happens.

Overall, I am finding that most days we embrace the busyness of life with a toddler and have fun with it. This month alone we have enjoyed: boating, gymnastics, parks, swimming, feeding ducks, numerous play-dates, shopping trips, days at the zoo, trip to the museum, lunch dates, trip to the waterpark, picnics, movie nights...and the list goes on and on, and I remain grateful for each and every day.

Elliana and Mommy feeding the ducks

Daddy & Elliana riding an amusement ride. Just look at their smiles!

Our little monkey learning to swing on a trapeze at gymnastics

"Hey Doggie"

I don't remember what it feels like to be 19 months old. I don't remember my first trip to the zoo. I don't remember the feeling of feeding an animal for the first time and the initial excitement of familiarity when I recognized something I knew.

I do remember our family trip to the zoo a few weeks ago. I remember my daughter's excitement as she saw goats in a fenced off area. I remember her jumping up and down in Daddy's arms trying to get to the goats faster than we were walking. I remember Daddy setting Elliana down and allowing her to walk on her own toward the four-legged animals. And, I will never forget Elliana's loud greeting of "HEY DOGGIE!" to the goats.

Admist our chuckles, we explained that not all four-legged animals were dogs, and that she was in fact surrounded by goats. Elliana then proceeded to point at the goats accusingly and say "No doggie. Hi goat."
Everyday, as Elliana grows, new memories are made. In my heart, I know that most of these memories that Elliana has created will too be forgotten as she grows. As I age, I pray I always will remember the joys of being Elliana's Mom. The joys of the silly, everyday details that make our life special. The details that make us a family.

Family Vacations

Words cannot describe the amount of joy that a family vacation brings to my soul. This week we returned from 5 days in the Great Smoky Mountains where we hiked, shopped and overall grew as a family.

Elliana's growth in those few days is absolutely remarkable. New words flew out of her mouth as each new experience was absorbed into her ever growing brain. Mini sentences began to develop and I can hardly believe that my baby girl is almost 19 months old, yet at times acts and behaves so much older.

We are trying to instill a sense of adventure in Elliana that books alone can't teach her. A love for life and travel, new experiences and challenges. I think this trip has brought us all one step closer toward those goals.


Although vacations may cost a little bit of money, the experience and memories are priceless. Perhaps that is why I am already wrapped up in planning our next family getaway.

Raising a Little Girl

About two years ago, I learned that I was pregnant with a little girl. Our family of two was growing to include a daughter, a precious beautiful little girl we met a few months later.

I was incredibly excited to be having a daughter, though the more I thought about it, anxiety began to creep in a little bit. If we were having a boy, the masculine responsibilities would fall on my husband to teach him to be all that was expected of a little boy. But, we were blessed with a little girl, and that responsibility was on me.

As the woman of the family, it would be my responsibility to show Elliana how to be a little girl. To be gentle and sweet, empathetic but not a crybaby. Loving and kind, yet not a pushover or too soft-spoken. The pressure was on, even if just imagined or concocted by my own mind.

During pregnancy, I heard that the first year of life...all babies were about the same regardless of anatomy. They ate, slept and played. No defining boy/girl characteristics or pressures to succumb to. This was music to this momma's ears and took the pressure off for a while.

Looking back, I really wonder why I was ever nervous about having a daughter. Elliana seems to have "girliness" stamped in her DNA. At just a few months old, Elliana would dance with happiness when I asked her if she wanted to go shopping. By 10 months of age, Elliana would "steal" my purse, throw it over her shoulder and head for the door.



At almost 19 months, the girliness has only been enhanced. Elliana loves to pull shoes out of my closet and prance around the house in my high heels. On more than one occassion, Elliana takes my lipstick out of the diaper bag and generously applies it to her baby lips. If another child is crying, Elliana says "uh-oh, oh no" until the child is calm again. When wearing dresses, Elliana instinctually twirls around the room to show off her dress like a princess at a royal ball.



I can't imagine my life without Elliana as my daughter, and rather than full of anxiety that the responsiblity to raise a girl is mine...I am filled with joy and gratitude.