Peace from within

Philippians 4:6-7 (New Living Translation)

⁶ Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. ⁷ Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.

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I've been reading and studying the bible for most of my life. It was only recently that this verse truly struck me and became abundantly powerful. For after all, worry can steal our joy. And amidst chaos and confusion, I will choice to rejoice in the abundance of joys surrounding me, and recognize the peace that is beginning to flourish from within.

* The joy of watching my daughter learn how to use the restroom. At her pace. Exceeding my expectations along the way.

* The peace of trusting in God, knowing that His plan is better than my own. Even when it doesn't make sense to me.

* The joy of friends and family who are supporting and encouraging us.

* The peace of knowing what happiness feels like, and cherishing each moment of uninhibited laughter as it comes.

* The joy of sharing my passions with my daughter, and watching her discover her own passions in life.

* The peace of finding the right scripture, at the right time.

* The joy of playing hide and seek with a 2-year old, especially when I know that she will hide in the same spot every time. And the laughter she tries to conceal as she watches me "look" for her.

And so, on this late Monday night, I will wrap up. For I know I cannot document all of the joys I am currently learning. Or the peace that I am experiencing amidst confusion. All I know is that we are going through a journey. A journey with ups, downs and crazy curves along the way. And I am not worried about it, for I have peace.

Three Decades of Learning

I think it is funny how things change as we age. Our goals, tastes, even our life dreams are all shaped by our faith, family, friends and life experiences.

Last week, I was reminded of such changes as my thirtieth birthday came and went. I thought over my three decades here on earth and reflected at the many amazing experiences I've already had. Opportunities to live abroad in a foreign country for a year, at the young age of 16. To graduate from an Australia high school, learn the culture and find a part of myself. The growth and love that I experienced in Australia continues to touch me to this day, as do the friendships and family that I made during that year.

My home away from home, Terrigal, NSW Australia

14 years after my year abroad, I continue to think of my "second hometown" as a wonderful, nostalgic place in which I long to be again someday. I am grateful to have already returned to the land Down Under two additional times since leaving my host family in 1998, once with the husband that I used to dream about and pray for while roaming the sandy white beaches of the Central Coast. I know that one day, we will return again with our children and I am already looking forward to that day.

My college roommate and I touring France, 2003

I reflected on my travels, friends, family and adventures in the past 3 Each bringing a unique experience, of which I wouldn't change a thing. The countries I visited prior to marriage, made me into an independent, worldly person, all before the age of 23. After marriage, I slightly regretted having gone so many places by myself, as I now longed to share those experiences with my husband. And so, together T.J. and I began to travel together, touring places I had never before been and a handful of places which I had been prior. Tahiti, Hawaii, Caribbean, Australia and various places within our own country. And now, with a two year old in tow, we continue to travel and learn and grow, as a family.

Our Happy Family on vacation, September 2010

As a young child, I dreamed of being a marine biologist or zookeeper when I grew up. That dream remained until junior high when I took my first biology class and realized sadly that my career choices were not in my future. I developed a love for writing and began pursing journalism. Until I learned of my love for psychology. Until I learned of my love and desire to be a wife and mom. And now, I am happily and joyfully living with a job I never knew I wanted, but feel like I was designed to do. Be a mom and a wife. I am so very glad that with age, my dreams have changed and brought me exactly to where I want to be.

Along with happy and grateful thoughts surrounding my thirty years thus far, I was also reminded of a recent loss of which I feel my heart will never fully recover from. A miraculous blessing bestowed upon us and taken away too quickly. A little life that we will never hold or watch grow. As hard as it is, I know that I am learning and growing from our difficult experiences, just as we do from our joyful experiences. And my faith reminds me that someday, we will be reunited with our child.

And so, I have now completed three official decades of life and learning. I am grateful for each and every moment of that time. The good and the bad. The sad and the glad. And I am looking forward to a lifetime of learning ahead of me and the beautiful family I have been blessed with.

The Big Day at the Big Top

We've been looking forward to it since January. We read books to prepare for it. We set out a calendar and counted down the days until it's arrival. Yes, we were this excited for the circus!

Finally, the day had come. We woke up a tired toddler early from her nap in order to get to the big top for the pre-show party. But, she didn't seem to mind once she realized it was circus time.

We posed as clowns, got a temporary tattoo (which 2 days later she is still bragging about), tried on some clothes and posed for a few pictures of our family down on the floor where the action was about to take place.

Our seats were great. 14 rows from the front and amidst the action, yet not right in it either. Elliana continued to point and explain her excitement, and T.J. and I were elated just watching her joy. We both found ourselves wrapped up in the awe and excitement of the festivities.

Elliana didn't want to get any closer to the clowns than this animated drawing at the souveneir shop, but I took advantage of the photo opportunity.

As we were leaving, we asked Elliana her favorite part of the circus. "Going to the circus!!" she eagerly replied. Elliana then went on to talk about the elephants, tigers, clowns ("not so scary" she kept saying) and the many other wonders of the day. And what a great day it was.

No Words Necessary

I could write a million things about how cute and happy my daughter is...about her personality and her love for fashion and all things girly. BUT, sometimes... there are just no words necessary.

Paint, Pottery and 2-year olds...

When Elliana and I missed the opportunity to paint with our MOMS club outing, we knew that we had to reschedule with our friends for a future date. And, I am so very glad we did!

After all, typically when I think about 3 two-year olds, an 8-month old and a room full of fragile, breakable pottery..pleasant images don't come to mind. But, I couldn't have been more pleased or happy with our experience.

Elliana quickly picked out her colors and pottery, after a few re-suggestions on Mommy's part and we were ready to paint! A handprint was decided upon, and for a girl who hates any kind of mess on her hand, Elliana did surprisingly well.

Elliana even learned to enjoy the wet, gooey paint once she got the hang of it.

And so, although pottery and two year-olds might not typically paint a pretty picture in one's mind...it very much painted a pretty picture in my heart. After all, everything with friends is just a little bit better and more fun.